Honesty | ...back to the basics...

New Perspective

June 17, 2013 by julie · 2 Comments

The other day, I was having a rough day. My patience was thin, the kids were doing more arguing than playing nicely, and things just weren’t happening the way I wanted.

Sounds terrible, right? *eyeroll*

I was getting so frustrated. I felt like my day was spiraling out of control. I knew I was the only one who COULD control it, but I had given up. I was over that day. Done.

…and then I had a conversation with a dear friend, who is also having some tough days– and honestly? She changed my entire perspective. By consciously knowing that my kids are gifts from God and not little humans set out to dismantle my plans, the fog had somehow lifted and my patience was starting to restore.

Incredible what a quick conversation with a friend can do!

At the end of the day I prayed that God would continue to lift the fog, continue to show me how amazing my kids are, and keep me focused on the good in life– not the bad days.

I think it is something that we all go through at some point. But– bad days don’t mean bad lives. Bad days happen. God’s grace carries us. And oh, I am so thankful He is carrying me.

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pinned from here

Filed Under: about me, friends, honesty ·

Part of Me

April 14, 2013 by julie · 6 Comments

Part of me hates unloading and loading the dishwasher.

But all of me is thankful that we have dishes to eat off of and food to eat.

Part of me hates doing the laundry.

But all of me feels blessed to be able to clothe my children.

Part of me hates cooking.

But all of me is thankful that I know how to prepare a meal for my family or others.

Part of me gets irritated when my best laid plans go awry.

But all of me knows that life is not mine to control.

Part of me wants to expand our family because I know that children are a blessing.

But all of me can’t commit to that idea when I am feeling overwhelmed as it is.

Part of me has bigger hopes and dreams that I fear I will never accomplish.

But all of me knows that He has the plan that is best.

Part of me knows that sometimes, parenting is hard.

But all of me knows that being a mother is a calling and a blessing, and for that I am thankful. Even on the days where the silver lining is hard to find.

Filed Under: about me, honesty ·

When Real Life Calls

March 26, 2013 by julie · 11 Comments

It’s been quiet(er) over here lately. I make no excuses or apologies. I have a real life outside of blogging, and most of the time, that wins.

My primary role is that of wife and mom, and in the last 3 weeks, it REALLY has had to be a priority.

Illness.

No energy.

No alone time.

No inspiration.

Extra snuggles for the kids.

Extra time to care for myself.

It happens. It’s called life.

And honestly, I have had my camera out ONCE in the last 3 weeks, and only because I had a photo shoot.

Do I want to grow my blog? Yes. Do I want to engage more with you guys who come back day after day? Yes. But right now, in this season, it just isn’t a priority, and you know what? That’s ok.

I get overwhelmed reading posts about growing your blog and paying for readers and analytics and how to subscribe to blogs now that Google Reader is going away. It’s overwhelming to participate in link ups week after week when I am barely getting out of my yoga pants. (I LOVE doing these posts–but lately, I just can’t get motivated!) It’s hard to read tweets about growing sponsorships and doing it the “right” way and blogger vs. wordpress and I really just needed to take a step back.

I don’t get to sit in front of a computer all day every day. I don’t get countless hours to brainstorm for this little space online. I don’t get paid to blog. Do I love the community I have here? Absolutely. Do I wish I could spend more time on Twitter/Pinterest/Instagram or dreaming up inspiring posts to draw people in? YES! Do I wish I could spend hours learning and excelling at Photoshop and making pretty graphics with pretty fonts? Yes. Do I wish I could spend all day networking with “bigger” bloggers and companies and promote everything I love? YES.

But truthfully, I can’t. Not now.

Right now, the important ones are the other 3 people living under this roof. And right now, they have to be my number one.

I want to be inspired. I want to grow. I want to take beautiful photos and share them here. I want to share real life stories, moments about my kids now that I want to treasure. And I will.

I just need to take a step back.

Filed Under: about me, honesty, just for fun, life as a mom ·

Moments of Realization

February 3, 2013 by julie · 2 Comments

Do you ever have a moment where something just clicks? An “aha” moment, as Oprah would say. I have had a few of those lately, and 99% of them have to do with my kids.

In my reading of No More Perfect Moms, I learned that I am in fact, NOT perfect. No one is. But– I can do better.

We seem to be in a winter/hibernation rut. Too cold to be outside, nowhere to go, and battling the sickies. We all have a slight case of cabin fever, and I am just at my wit’s end with these kiddos of mine.

Coupled with myself getting over being sick, Kenley’s newest discovery-tantrums!, and more TV being watched than I would like to admit, I am feeling like a failure. I am dreading the start of another week. Dreading another day stuck in this house with two kids that are totally over any activity I put in front of them.

I shouldn’t feel like this.

I just feel like I am losing at this whole mom thing lately….and I can’t put my finger on it.

But, just like today and yesterday and the day before, tomorrow I will get up, kiss those sweet babies and try to make the most of the day even when I feel like it can’t go uphill. These moments are fleeting–even the trying ones.

Here’s to a better tomorrow.

Filed Under: Brayden, family, honesty, Kenley, Kids ·

Simplicity

October 7, 2012 by julie · 4 Comments

Simplicity.

This word instantly brings images of a beach, sun, and sand to my mind. Not an overflowing sink full of dishes and Thomas the Train engines covering every free surface in the living room.

Living more simply. Living with less. Less clutter. Less stress. Isn’t that something we ALL strive for?

It’s tough when there is just so much LIFE around you everywhere you turn. To do lists, kid’s needs, chores, laundry, bills, organizing, filing, grocery shopping, and on and on and on. It’s just a LOT. And though I try my best to not worry about the next day’s or next weeks or next YEARS events–sometimes I catch myself thinking about them. But honestly, I don’t feel as if I am dwelling on them. Does that make sense?

This whole episode I have had with hives I have been battling has been a giant warning sign. Warning me not to get too wrapped up in the ways of the world, the upcoming events, and things that I simply have no control over. But to simplify. Live day to day. Plan as best as I can with room for errors and changes.

Live. Live with the best intentions, knowing that the only thing in life you can really count on is change.

Do I wish my body would have NOT freaked out? Um, yes because it was miserable (and I am not 100% over it yet) and just really unnecessary. BUT- it apparently WAS something I needed to re-evaluate. And even though I feel like I am in a good place, maybe my body feels otherwise. But I am more aware, more equipped to face life head on and try really hard not to sweat the small stuff.

How do you slow down, simplify, and re-evaluate?

Filed Under: about me, anxiety, honesty · Tagged With: simplicity

On my mind

June 19, 2012 by julie · 4 Comments

Have you ever been in a situation with someone where you completely disagreed with what they are doing and it gets you all fired up inside but you don’t know what to do about it?

(note: I am not talking about anything specific in this post, and have tried to make this post as generalized as possible.)

I am almost 100% positive that you have. And it’s a tough spot to be in!

Source: lovestitched.com via AmandaSilva on Pinterest

This has happened to me in the past and I get so torn on what to do. Confront people? Cover my eyes and ears and pretend I don’t notice? Tell them that I don’t agree with what they are doing? Because really they should be making those decisions themselves. (I am referring to people over the age of 18 in general). And if they don’t care about themselves and are putting themselves or others into harm’s way or just making bad decisions knowingly, is it really any of my business? This is where it gets tricky.

My sister and I discussed this one time and she said she felt like it was like watching someone about to walk out in front of a Mac truck who didn’t see it coming, but she did and couldn’t warn them. I loved her perspective on that, but it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with these situations arise.

Which leads me to this question: Why is it that some people seem to have no measurement for what is right and what is wrong? And what makes them choose “wrong” (by society’s standards) and how can they knowingly do something that is wrong, but yet think it’s ok? At what point does it become your business? I try not to care about what others think of me and the decisions I make, so why do I feel like sometimes I am caring too much about the decisions that other people are making?

What would you/have you done in these types of situations?

Filed Under: honesty ·

Hesitant

May 8, 2012 by julie · 5 Comments

I am hesitant to post about this because it’s something I JUST kind of decided I wanted to do and who knows if I can actually stick to it…

I want to get into running.

I know. The girl who walked the mile every year for PE class, yet was able to complete them during cheerleading practice. (Also, why do cheerleaders need to run THAT far?)

Anyways, yes. Over the weekend, I decided I wanted to get into running. I need to do SOMETHING to keep off this baby weight now that Kenley is only nursing twice a day. I have relied on breastfeeding for far too long to rid myself of those extra calories, and I just want to be fit. I want to be able to run. I want to lose some weight and tone up. I want to make better eating decisions. But mostly, I just want to feel good about myself and keep up with my busy kids!

I have been inspired by several ladies… Ruthanne, Leah, Ashley, and Katie- reading their blogs about running and how much progress they have made is truly awesome. It makes me feel like I can really start from nowhere and no matter how fast or far I can run, I am doing something awesome for my body, my mind, and my overall well-being.

Sunday night I started out using the Ease into 5K app on my iPhone. It was recommended by a friend, and I really like it so far! I stretched and completed 2 of the 3 reps that was required to pass that level. Unfortunately, I didn’t complete because the lack of support from my sports bra combined with my already sore girls from ending nursing- let’s just say OUCH. BUT I am proud to say that I did better than I expected. I ordered a new sports bra so that will help!

The hardest part for me will be making the time, but I really, really need to do this. So it will become a priority, and maybe, I will actually get to the point where I love it.

Filed Under: exercise, honesty ·

Not a good day

July 13, 2011 by julie · 6 Comments

Today was not a good day. It was an awful day. Crabby kiddo, one hour nap, incessant whining, dragging me all over, then the finale of throwing himself onto the floor found him in bed at 7pm and me wishing it was 9pm so I could take my meds and go to bed myself.

My hormones are raging and the tears will not stop flowing.

How will I do this with two kids? HOW?

When will Brayden get that he can’t just drag me along everywhere? Or sit directly on my belly? Or not to rough house with me so much?

I am so overwhelmed with emotions, about what this transition will do to my little boy. And I only have 12 weeks left with him as an only. Of course, I am so excited about his baby sister, but I am almost mourning the loss of my only. The one I live and breathe for. How will I open myself to MORE love?

When will I know when he is ready for his new room? When will he talk more? Understand more? Listen more? Communicate in a way that is without stomping his feet? Should I be concerned? Is it just because he is a boy? Am I not doing enough?

The end of this day has left me feeling very inadequate. I hope tomorrow is better.