Wedded Wednesdays: Roles

One thing that I always knew, was that Brandon had a very traditional role of marriage. To put it frankly, the man was the breadwinner, the woman stayed home with the children, and dinner was always on the table at 6pm. Well, at least, that is what I expected his view to be. After we got married, I had one semester of college left (that included a night class) and I always felt bad getting home late and him having to “fend for himself”. Looking back, I wish I could have told myself back then to get over it! Brandon was more than capable- we both lived separately until we were married. But as the wife, I always felt somewhat guilty that I wasn’t providing for my husband in this way.

Fast forward to 4 weeks ago. After a surprise C-section, I really needed to rely on Brandon for basic things, like helping me get in and out of the shower once we were home, going to run errands, and keeping up on the laundry. Mind you, he was still working crazy hours, and I just felt bad NOT being able to take care of him. One night, I finally lost it. I told him how it just didn’t seem fair, that I was laying around most of the day and he was doing all of the work. He looked me straight in the eye and said “Honey, you have no idea what you have just been through. Seeing you go through that to get Brayden here was the scariest thing I have ever seen. You let me take care of you so you can take care of him.” It is amazing how quickly your roles in marriage change when there is a baby involved. Even after childbirth, I was feeling guilty, and needed that bounce back to reality to realize where my role really is now. It is mother first, and wife second. It’s a tough adjustment, but it’s been pretty smooth because Brandon has been there to step in every time I have needed him. I am incredibly blessed!